Thanksgiving Self Care

With Thanksgiving just a few days away many of you may be feeling excited, but some of you may also be feeling a sense of dread that can sometimes come with the holiday season. 

The holidays are a stressful time, but if we practice good self-care, we can make it through without losing our Zen. Even if you love the holidays, they can still be stressful. Below you will find some suggestions on how to keep you Zen and still have fun this week. 

 Be sure to take some time for you.  I recommend that even if you love the holidays, be sure to take at least 5 minutes a day of quiet time for yourself. You can do this in the form of sitting still in the mornings or before bed to focus on your breath, or by enjoying a steaming hot cup of your favorite morning beverage by yourself on the patio. The weather is going to be a great this Thanksgiving week here in Silicon Valley, so get outside and enjoy a few moments by yourself. 

 Set appropriate boundaries. If you have already made certain plans, and someone wants to come in and change things up to better suit them, don’t just give in to the change if it won’t work for you. You know what I am talking about: there is always that one person in your family or amongst your friends who always tries to change the plan at the last minute. Rather than saying “Yes” to the change right away, assess if the change is going to work for you and everyone else involved before agreeing to the change. If the change won’t work, simply say: “I am sorry that your plans have changed, we will see you when you get here.” 

Another great reminder about setting appropriate boundaries is to remember to say “No” if something isn’t going to work for you. So many of us fall into the trap of saying “Yes” when we want to say “No,” so just honor the feeling of saying “No” and stick with it. Someone might get upset with you upholding a boundary initially, but in the end, you will be better off for it. 

 Accept that people are who they are. One of the most frustrating things about Thanksgiving and other holidays is when we set expectations for things to be different or people to be different, but they show up as their regular selves. Meaning, if you have a brother who drinks too much then gets rowdy, you might hope that for Thanksgiving dinner he might be on his best behavior. However, when he shows up, gets drunk on all the mulled wine you’ve made, and starts to get loud, rather than getting upset and engaging in with his behavior, accept that your brother is who your brother is and continue on with the festivities. If you struggle with the someone else’s drinking behavior, Al-Anon might be a good resource for you to check out—and they are always open, especially during the holidays. 

Lastly, if Thanksgiving is way too stressful for you to be around family, you can always plan to not participate in all the hub-hub that goes on around that holiday. You can plan a “Friendsgiving,” cook up your own turkey and all the fixings (or even cook up chicken enchiladas if those are your favorite food), rent a few fun non-holiday themed movies, or even do a Sex in the City marathon watching the entire series on DVD throughout the day. There are choices. You don’t have to do something just because it is what everyone else does. The important thing is to keep your Zen. 

Wishing you and yours a wonderful Thanksgiving, whether you choose to do it with family, friends, or by yourself. Cheers!

If you struggle during the holidays, contact us today for your free initial consultation.